Shhh! She's Straight!

Hold on to your hats. Being happily married, having children and a good job is now offensive. If you talk about it in public, that is.

Actress Jada Pinkett Smith is under fire for a speech she made at Harvard University that was overly "heteronormative" and made gay students feel uncomfortable by not sufficiently addressing their status, reports The Crimson.

Organizers of the Cultural Rhythms show are apologizing for the offense caused by the wife of actor Will Smith (search). In the speech, she was said to be giving the story of her life "and her perspective was a heterosexual perspective.

No perspectives outside of the politically correct one are allowed at Harvard. Just ask its president.

"She wasn't trying to be offensive. But some felt she was taking a narrow view, and some people felt left out," the apology reads.

Left out of the couples’ marriage? Are they feeling insulted because they are sure that Jada and Will would absolutely refuse to invite them over for a threesome?

Not being a lesbian, a bisexual or a sociologist, how is Pinkett Smith supposed to discuss such relationships with any amount of knowledge? She’s an actress, for Heaven’s Sake and, for a pleasant change of pace, was talking about something on which she *has* done some research.

(Somehow, I suspect that if Elton John arrived at Harvard to discuss wonders of long-term heterosexual marriage, this group would have naught to say.)

Members of the Bisexual, Gay, Lesbian, Transgender, and Supporters Alliance (BGLTSA) said Pinkett Smith's comments implied that standard sexual relationships are only between males and females.

Maybe they’re upset because they suspect that if one of the girls hit on lovely Jada, that she’d probably say no politely while trying to hold down her breakfast.

If the overwhelming majority of a group is heterosexual, then that is the norm. Anything else is *abnormal.* Not crazy, not worthy of being thrown into re-education camps, just abnormal, without the baggage that the word implies. (Note: left-handed people, like yours truly, are also abnormal.) Additionally, Ms. Pinkett Smith did say she was speaking from her *own* perspective.

Between this incident, female *scientists* having lady-like fainting spells over Larry Summers’ remarks and on-going PEST symptoms, the campus shrinks and pharmacists must be working overtime handing out little pink pills.

(Thanks to Ambra Nykola)