Any military man knows you shouldn't do this; and then they go ahead and train, equip, and set up the logistics for the last war. History is a bloody testament to our inability to MOVE ALONG. It's bewildering that right now, in spite of widespread information on Fighting The Last War Syndrome, we're being inundated with new examples. Maybe 2007 is going to be the "Year of The Last War." From the ridiculous to the bizarre and the over-the-top to the truly frightening, here are some famous last wars currently being fought:
Europeans are still seeking to bring the worker's paradise to the continent, while the Democratic National Committee considers getting behind that hot new defense scheme, NATO: (Via Breitbart:)
OPORTO, Portugal (Reuters) - European Socialists promised on
Thursday to work to rebuild Europe's strategic alliance with the United
States now that the Democrats control Congress after last month's
elections.
Socialist leaders attending a meeting of the European Socialist
Party pledged that with the Democrats on the rise, strong ties could be
renewed with the United States after years of cool relations with
Republican President George W. Bush.
Howard Dean, chairman of the national committee of the U.S.
Democratic Party, is attending the two-day conference together with the
leaders of leftist governments of several countries and party leaders
from across Europe.
Then there's Britney Spears, perpetually trying to peel off the goody-two-shoes image. (No links needed, unfortunately, everyone on the planet has seen her antics already.) Uh, Brit, we got it that you're not a Mouseketeer anymore. Can we talk now about the job of MOTHER?
A strong contender for Last War champion has got to be Nancy Pelosi.
Here's a woman who hasn't even taken delivery yet on the Emperor's New
Clothes and already she's defaulted back to Haight-Ashbury. Every time she opens her mouth I expect her to channel
Timothy O'Leary and start telling us to "Tune In, Turn On and Drop
Out." The rest of America got over the sixties by, at the very latest,
the eighties, but Nancy just can't find her way off the Viet Nam War
protest lines. She just knows if she finds the right magic committee
chair appointments, we'll FINALLY achieve peace in our time.
Nancy is so strongly saturated with Last War Syndrome that her
followers are similarly afflicted just from breathing her fumes.
Completely forgetting that girls started wearing jeans to school before most of them were born, Nancy's fawning media accolytes recently almost wet themselves in their excitement about how STUNNING and MODERN Nancy looked in her pantsuit.
My God, next thing you know, she'll be using her new powers to de-criminalize THE PILL!
And we can't forget Hillary Clinton, manic in her attempts to triangulate past Bobbie Ann - Polly Kyle - Gennifer Flowers - Whitewater - Susan McDougal - Cookie Baking Boycotts - Paula Jones - Monica Lewinski - Health Care - The Iraq War yes no yes no - Dick Morris - Barack Obama - whew, have to catch my breath here.
Hillary can't put down the triangulation tool because that would leave nothing but her basic personality. Which presumably was torched by Bill on the way to the Governor's Mansion in Arkansas, and has been MIA ever since. Except for temper tantrums, blaming of underlings and smarmy ex-cheerleader impersonations at campaign events, of course. Can't medical researchers find a fast-forward button for people?
We all know Hillary's bound for oblivion and footnote hell in the shadow of Bill. Why can't we
just get it done NOW?
The upcoming presidential campaign will be a mind-numbing sinkhole of Hillary reprising the high-speed 180, ad nauseum. The prospect makes a diet of Polonium 210 look kind.
And speaking of poisonings and incomprehensibly ornate plots, have you placed your bets for the Kremlin's 3,783rd round of spy / military / diplomat / gulag tag? Those madcap boys in the mink hats just never get tired of it, do they? I'd worry more about the unsporting switch from good old cyanide to dioxins and now to radioactives, but they're still slipping the goods into the same old vodka, so what the heck!
I'll make only passing note of the "economic justice" crowd agitating for the thousandth time about living wages and economic opportunity; on their way to notch up the minimum wage for the 78th, and still ineffective, time.
We'll leave the stoned silly academic censors, now going into their third decade of honoring free speech by trying to shut down the communications of everyone who disagrees with them. 50 and 60 year old professors rant at their puzzled students, who wonder how a tenured, beemer driving grandfather can deprecate "the man" with a straight face.
Radical feminists are forever locked in a battle against wage inequalities and Playboy style porn. They marginalize themselves and sell out their principles in an outdated effort to appear "inclusive." Their daughters laugh at them, then take up the entrepreneur's cross and worry about date rape drugs and the genital mutilations of millions of their Muslim sisters.
Women's Studies programs all across American anxiously count the number of female authors in literature class anthologies. Genuine revolutionary women are trying to come to grips with the fact anti-culture Islamists are outbreeding, intimidating and murdering all the rest of us. Their serious and urgent fear is that every scrap of western literature, regardless the sex of the author, will be lost to the tides of Jihad.
But you get the picture. Fighting the Last War is certainly all the rage. Problem is, the next war has already started and we are already losing. This is a war for civilization, a war for the souls of men, a war for freedom, prosperity and dignity. Jihad seeks to unplug the reformation, the industrial revolution, the divine light of the rights of individuals. We can't fight this one like we've ever fought before. And our learning curve must be short. The lights are already going out in Europe, Africa, South East Asia and the Middle East.
So back to those who get their news from "People" magazine. Perhaps we could fight terror with tarnished bling. Let's put burkas on Britney, Paris, Rosie, Katie, Hillary, Nancy and every radical feminist in the country, wire them up with speed and caffeine so they can't stop talking, then smuggle them into select women's compounds.
Ahmadinejad et al would surrender within days.
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