baldilocks

Portlandia-Is This Something? (KingShamus)

I don't get IFC channel, but because I read Sitting On The Edge of The Sandbox, Biting My Tongue and her great blog I don't have to. She's a fan of "Portlandia", a show on IFC. Check out her take.

The real white people are not in New Hampshire, and certainly not in Iowa or South Carolina. The real white people are in the Pacific North-West, and they are California transplants.

We started watching Portlandia on a Big Hollywood tip, and I can’t believe nobody told us about it last year. Like Stuff White People Like, a blog I proudly feature on my blogroll under humor, Portlandia ridicules mores and tastes of white upper middle class liberals.

...Liberals making fun of themselves, quite maliciously so at times, is nothing new. What’s surprising is that self-mockery is coming from Carrie Brownstein of a super-earnest grrrl band Sleater-Kinny and Fred Armisen who sabotages Obama skits on SNL. I suspect Brownstein and Armisen feel liberated to be funny on Portlandia only when they are performing for an elite audience of like-minded white liberals.

Read the rest.

All I know is that this is the funniest Fred Armisen has ever been in his entire half-assed comedy career.

Watch him in this Saturday Night Live opening skit. Get your pillow and blankie for when you doze off 25 seconds in.

Granted, the writers gave Armisen a whole 2.3 jokes to fill a three minute bit. It's hard to be funny there isn't anything remotely resembling humor anywhere in the material. That doesn't excuse Fragile Fred for his ponderous performance. Armisen doesn't deliver a punchline so much as wrestle it to the ground, tear it open, light it on fire, stuff it into your mailbox, then look at you with pleading eyes desperately craving your approval.

One gets the sense that Armisen--and SNL in general--can't really go after Obama all that hard. They don't want to hammer the President because he's their guy. SNL, along with the rest of the court jester/palace guard media, will not humiliate the politician that most reflects their values. So they pull their punches at every opportunity, which not only makes them kool-aid drinkers but incredibly boring as well.

But the shackles come off when slightly famous liberals can make fun of average everyday liberals on a cable TV show. Watch the Portlandia clip.

Oh well. We'll call that progress.

Funny, timely and just a little self-deprecating to boot. Wow. It's amazing what one can do when you're not shooting jokes in the balls so they don't hurt your side of the political spectrum.

What's really cool is how "Portlandia" is pretty much the proggy version of Larry The Cable Guy. I know liberals--especially bitter old hacks like David Cross-- hate Larry The Cable Guy. What the lefties can't get is that Larry isn't glorifying the hillbilly peckerwood lifestyle, he's satirizing it. His material pokes fun at the silliness of the South. He's a conservative Southerner laughing with--and at--other Southerners.

It's easier to take jokes from your own people, rather than take them from an outsider. Irishmen can call their fellow Emerald Islanders drunk bog-trotting micks and it's all good. If Germans were actually capable of generating humor, they'd start by calling themselves humorless krauts and then they'd politely giggle about it under their breath.

Same thing with Southerners. They know Cable Guy is having a laugh at their expense. But they can take it from him because a) he's one of theirs and b) they know Larry's bits are based in the reality of Southern life.

"Portlandia" is the comforting laugh that lefties can have on themselves. Conveniently, it's also the laugh conservatives can have on liberalism too. That's always nice.

Media Personalities and The Need For Mystery (KingShamus)

Ever wonder why there doesn't seem to be a lot of genuine stars in pop culture anymore?

Well, John Nolte comes up with a pretty sharp zinger of an explanation.

Any actor who chooses to make something — anything, including their sexuality – a part of their identity, limits how the public will perceive them up on the screen. This is true for straight actors as well, especially those who have made their sexuality a big part of who they are. Beneath all that Barbie doll there might be a genuine actress, but Pam Anderson’s very public sex kitten persona limits her roles. And just to be fair and non-partisan… In his later years, it simply wouldn’t have been possible for Charlton Heston to play an anti-gun ACLU type without harming the audience’s ability to suspend their disbelief. The whole idea would’ve come off as some kind of in-joke, and if that joke wasn’t meant to be part of the overall story you have something of a disaster on your hands.

Read the whole thing.  Nolte takes a few whiney gay actors down a peg or two in his piece.  Heads up, Richard Chamberlain.  "The Thorn Birds" really wasn't all that great.

Nolte touches on something very basic, but something that a lot of entertainers forget nowadays.  It's the mystery that keeps people interested in media personalities long after the person has reached their creative zenith.  Nothing sustains a career in pop culture more than some strategic obfuscation to keep the audience guessing. 

For instance, the private lives of the members of Led Zeppelin were anything but common knowledge back in the 70's.  Beyond the fact that three members were married and that they all lived in England, the public didn't have much access to Zep.  The band consciously cultivated a nearly impenetrable mystique, which kept people wondering about them.  This aura of mystery--along with the undeniable songwriting talent--helped to make Led Zeppelin a massively successful band.

Consider this little nugget about Zep: In 1975 the band released Physical Graffiti, their sixth studio album.  Members of the band gave very few interviews to support the release of their album.  There were no cameras following Jimmy Page around to document his every move.  Robert Plant didn't discuss his political affiliation or his partisan ideology.  John Paul Jones and John Bonham were likely to jokingly sneer or angrily snarl at any reporter who asked them who they voted for in the last election.  The group didn't mention the causes or charities they support.  Led Zeppelin simply let the music speak for themselves.

The results?  Physical Grafitti immediately became a massive seller.  Not only that, the group's entire back catalogue re-entered the Top 200 as well.  The tour that supported the album was incredibly lucrative as well.  Led Zeppelin had become the biggest band of the 1970's.

Distance between the musicians and their audience was critical to Led Zeppelin's success.  For actors, that sense of mystery is even more important.  A rock vocalist is basically playing himself...or at least some facet of his personality...when he writes, records or performs music.  An actor is playing a different person everytime he takes on a new role.  That means that the actor's real personality can't be so well-known that it smothers the part he's trying to play.

This is not to say that successful actors don't create personas.  However, there's a big difference between a 'type' and 'My actual self and my movie self are pretty much the same'.  Sean Penn may have been a talented actor back in the Yuri Andropov era, but any role he takes nowadays is overpowered by his off-screen leftwing douchebaggery.  The only movie persona Penn has left is the one he plays in the real world--Thumbsucking Liberal Hack/Commie Dictator Apologist/Smug Peace Creep.

To see how a real star should operate, look at Kurt Russell.  Russell is a member of the Libertarian Party, but he doesn't make a huge deal about it.  Surely the man has causes that he champions, but you don't hear him talk about them all that much.  It's common knowledge that he's in a long term relationship with Goldie Hawn, but Russell hasn't put the intimate details of his sexual history into the public record.  Consequently, there is no outsized real-world Kurt Russell that fights against the roles he takes.

Look at Russell's performance in the flawed sci-fi action flick "Soldier".  Compare that to his work in the more successful comedy "Overboard".  Both movies call for very different kinds of acting, but because Russell doesn't have a lot of off-camera drama going on, he's entirely believable as both a near mute futuristic warrior or as a charming modern day rogue.  Viewers might not connect with everything Russell does--homeboy is just as prone to the occasional cinematic dud as anybody else in show biz--but his private life never interferes with movie goers' suspension of disbelief.

The modern entertainment business can't seem to grasp the absolutely vital necessity for mystery.  Instead, the stars blab about their politics, their personal lives and their STD's at the drop of a hat.  As a result, the lack of separation between the performer and the audience has made the art small and the artists even smaller.

Dangerous Women (Updated: Cowan is a Liberal)

A Vermont man shot his television set after watching as Bristol Palin, daughter of Former Governor and former vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin (R-AK) lived to dance another day on the television program Dancing With the Stars.

[Sixty-seven year old Steve] Cowan “jumped up and swore, saying something to the effect of “the  —-ing politics.”The complaint added,  ”Steven was upset that a political figure’s daughter was dancing on this particular show when Steven did not think she was a good dancer.”

I keep saying that the unhinged hatred that Leftists have for Bristol and her mother is spiritually-induced, from the bad side-- which is why it's illogical--and here's what it's about: abortion.

The label "pro-choice" is pure BS; most of its proponents should properly be labeled 'pro-abortion.'  And for those who have successful convinced all too many women that abortion isn't really murder; for those who have fooled women of the "wrong genetic sort" into believing that they aren't doing the elites' bidding when they cut off their succeeding generations, Sarah and Bristol Palin are two of the most dangerous women in America. 

Both Palins chose to let their children live under two of the "adverse" circumstances which are usually used to justify abortion.  By doing so, the two set examples for other women and may plant the idea in other women that they need not murder their own children under similar circumstances.  This is why the Palins often cause a full-blown, foaming, freak-out in many of those who adhere to Leftist ideology or who have been brain-washed by it, even when something as inconsequential as winning favor on a reality show is the subject at hand. (Then there are the women who are still playing out their high school-engendered neuroses, but that's a separate issue.)

I bet this Cowan has marched in a pro-"choice" rally or two, probably because his wife nagged him into doing it.  

A spiritual battle? Yes.  The force of evil--Satan--wants us all destroyed and those who justify the murder of the unborn are merely his tools. This is why the pro-abortionists are so rabid about those who defend innocent life. "Noooo, don't take away my right to commit genocide again myself, you brute!!!!" 

To Leftists, Sarah and Bristol Palin made the "wrong" choice--life--and for that, the morally bankrupt must demonize them, inverting wrong and right as such people--and their Father--are wont to do.  That this genius only hurt his TV is something for which to be thankful.

(Thanks to Cubachi who's also posting over at Hot Air)

UPDATE: Thanks to Booker Rising for the link to this post and for the many others.  And it's always...erm...interesting when one of Shay's guests drops in for a visit. ;)

UPDATE: In the comments below, a un-medicated visitor freaks out as well:

Negress, what fornicating evidence do you have that Steven Cowan or anyone else who disagreed with the Dancing With the Stars, finals decision is a leftist?

Well, I did say that this murderer of TVs was either a Leftist or indoctrinated by lefist ideology (as almost all of us are).  As it turns out, my first conclusion was correct.

Larry Ziemer, a fellow town supervisor, said he has known Cowan for about 20 years.

"I have nothing but good things to say about Steve," Ziemer said. "It was totally out of character for this to occur. He just does an excellent job on the town board and in his private working life."

Ziemer said Cowan is a talented carpenter and is well-respected in the area. Ziemer said he had never heard Cowan speak ill of Sarah Palin or her family before.

“He and I agree pretty much on politics,” Ziemer said. “We would probably lean both to the liberal side.”

The unhingement was a big clue--both with Cowan and my charming guest.

The Lifestyle Left's Impossible Standards (King Shamus)

The television show "Glee" gets the gas-face from the moral prudes over at GLAAD.

Gay rights campaigners have lashed out at the producers and writers of TV musical Glee for including a controversial line about transvestites in the show's pre-Halloween tribute to The Rocky Horror Show.

The cast took on characters from the spooky and camp 1970s musical in a themed episode, which scored huge ratings last week (ends29Oct10).

But Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) officials have taken issue with the use of the word 'tranny' to describe Rocky Horror's chief character Frank-n-Furter, who dresses in stockings, lingerie and high heels.

In the Glee tribute, actor Harry Shum Jr.'s character Mike is forced to pull out of his role as Frank-n-Furter because his conservative parents don't want him to look like a "tranny".

If you're at all familiar with the show, than you already know that this particular program is very gay-friendly.  Homosexual themes run throughout several episodes.  The show's creators have actively sought out the support of gay advocacy groups. Yet even with all that goodwill, the show still finds itself in hot water with a wing of the liefstyle Left.

Check out GLAAD's statement.

A statement from GLAAD reads, "The casual manner in which the word was used is jarring, even if he (Shum, Jr's character) may have been repeating what his parents said.

"This inclusion of this slur is particularly alarming given last season's powerful episode in which Kurt's father chastised Finn for using the word 'f*g'. That episode sent a powerful message to the show's young fanbase that words have power and they can hurt.

"Unfortunately the larger problem here is that the word 'tranny' has become an easy punchline in popular culture, and many still don't realise that using the term is hurtful, dehumanising and associated with violence, hatred and derision against transgender people - a community that is nearly invisible in media today."

Lesson:  You can never win with these idiots.

Hell, you can't even break even with the gatekeepers of liberal morality.  At some point, even if you've got a sterling record of leftist happy-talk and progressive do-goodery, you will run afoul of some obscure politically correct edict.  When that occurs, expect a snippy finger-wagging retort, often from the very same groups you're trying to ingratiate yourself with.

There will come a time very soon when everybody to the right of the Noam Chomsky/Eric Holder/Andrew Sullivan Axis of Fail will be considered either a racist, a sexist or a homophobe.  That seems to be the endgame for groups like GLAAD or the NAACP.  Even better, look where GLAAD stands in the ideological universe.  They've turned into the very same type of judgemental sour-faced Puritans they say they hate.

The left loves to pat itself on the back for being tolerant and open-minded.  They even have studies proving just how great they are and how much conservatives supposedly suck.  There's just one problem: the actions of the progressives negate their glorious self-image.

Look at the environmental movement.  Global warming proponents urge people to forgo a plethora of pleasures, from gas-guzzling SUV's to beef to energy derived from coal-fired power plants.  Why?  Because these things are allegedly dirty and will cause anthropogenic climate change.

The science that backs up the Warmists has been forever soiled by ClimateGate, but it really doesn't matter.  What is important is that the believers follow the 'correct' doctrines.  More importantly than that, the faithful must stamp out heretics and sinners.  Conversion to the religion is nice, but what the Climate Changers really enjoy is being morally indignant. 

It's the same thing for the GLAAD crowd.  They must strike out against what they perceive as sin.  So the use of the word 'tranny' on a TV show; well, that simply cannot be tolerated.  That sort of immorality must be punished.  Loudly, publicly and with as much sneering haughty contempt as possible.  Far from being open-minded, many facets of the American left are virulently dogmatic.

There are definitely closed-minded conservatives.  There are certainly right-wingers that have a puritanical nature.  What conservatives should always remember is that the other side is at least as judgmental as they are, and perhaps even more so.

More Fun With Government Hack Jon Stewart (King Shamus)

For all the liberals who were crying in the comments of the last post, here's some more delicious nugat-rich irony.

President Obama plans to appear on Comedy Central's "Daily Show" shortly before the midterm elections, a senior White House official tells CBS News, in what will be his first appearance on the show since becoming president.

The appearance will be on Wednesday October 27th. It comes shortly before both the November 2nd midterm elections as well as host Jon Stewart's "Rally to Restore Sanity" on the National Mall on October 30th.

The president has been trying to rally the sort of young voters who watch Stewart's show to come out to vote in the midterm elections amid signs that they are less enthusiastic than they were two years ago. Democrats are trying to hold the House and Senate amid predictions of a potential wave election for Republicans, and among his campaign stops in the midterm cycle have been appearances at college campuses.

Jeeeeeebus, Stewart's not even sorta hiding his pathetic shill-job at this point.

Question for the audience:  Does anybody think Barry's appearance on The Obama Super Ass-Kiss Love-In The Daily Show is going to be the hard-hitting tough-minded interview that Jon Stewart demands from the 'real' media?  The guy bangs his rattle on his high chair whenever some clown in the MSM doesn't ask the correct progressive-minded questions.  I'm guessing Stewart tosses Obama a few softballs during the President's campaign stop appearance.

For liberals, it's high time to just admit that their media hero is just another statist operative.  I mean, really now, if leftists were honest they should be stoked.  Their media man-crush is getting to hang out with their political dream-boat.  Best of all, there's absolutely no chance Stewie will trouble St. Bamster with any icky right-of-center criticism or ideas.

It'll be just like 2008 again.

Movie Night

TNR said...eh, forget it.

Yesterday, Ace of Spades talked about the best movie made from a computer game (Mindsweeper). But later in the post, he asks his guests a couple of more inclusive questions:

1. Guy Movies That You Can Force A Chick To Watch Which She Might, Possibly, Somehow End Up Kinda-Sorta Liking, and

2. Movies You Should Not Even Bother Forcing A Chick To Watch Unless Two Hours Of Accusatory Silence Is Your Idea of A Really Good Time

For the most part, I’m not a chick-flick fan (with some exceptions). But then, I’m not an average chick but a military-indoctrinated chick--a retiree of the USAF/USAFR—and I would say that this fact makes a difference as to my entertainment choices. Many of us women who serve/have served in the military defy some of the stereotypes that are held (rightfully) about women. Even a great many of us women who served in the USAF—considered the least face-to-face combat-oriented of the five services--aren’t inclined to be comforted entertained *in the traditional manner* via our pop-cultural intake. I’d daresay that this fact is what made us open to joining up in the first place.

Keep that theory in mind as you note my favorite fifteen movies (alphabetical order, ignoring ‘the’ and ‘a’).

1. The Abyss (water, claustrophobia, romance and magic)
2. Aliens (Great action and possessing of some of the most enduring one-liners and dialogue in cinema.)

Pvt. Hudson (a man): Have you ever been mistaken for a man?
Pvt. Vasquez (a short-haired, tough woman): No. Have you?

(You might be able to guess why that's my favorite dialogue from that movie.)
3. The Color Purple (yes, it’s a chick-flick, but as someone said over at Ace’s, Whoopi and Oprah shined in this one; plus there’s some serious blues/gospel singing near the end which would cause many present-day praise/worship artists to just hang it up.)
4. Glory (Denzel Washington greatly deserved his Oscar here.)
5. The Godfather, parts I and II (after a few viewings, III wasn’t that bad either.)
6. The Hunt for Red October (Sean Connery was the man, in spite of his Scottish-accented Russian; additionally, there’s prospective presidential candidate Fred Thompson’s line: “Russians don’t take a dump without a plan, son.”)
7. Lord of the Rings series (enough said; favorite character as portrayed in the movies—Theoden.)
8. Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World (I like Russell Crowe better with a little meat on him; favorite scene, however, was when that one-armed midget, Lord Blakeney--portrayed by young Max Pirkis--capped one of his foes.)
9. Scent of a Woman (One of the few scenery chewings—by Al Pacino—that actually enhanced a movie. “God doth have a sense of humor.” However, Chris O’Donnell gave the better performance here.)
10. Serenity (Tough men, tough women, cannibalistic zombies; what's not to like? I haven’t seen the TV series, Firefly, yet, but the DVD from the first season just arrived via my Netflix account!)
11. The Shawshank Redemption (Whatever we conservatives may think about liberal Tim Robbins as far as his political views go, no one can deny that he gave an awesome performance in this one.)
12. The Silence of the Lambs (For a long time, this movie was my absolute favorite; I had read the book and, as far as the movie went, the storyline and the performances were absolutely masterful.)
13. A Soldier's Story (A little known WWII tale about an all-black unit from the then-segregated US Armed Forces featuring Denzel Washington, the late Howard Rollins of the nineties TV show In the Heat of the Night and the late Adolph Caesar, who portrayed Mister’s father in The Color Purple.)
14. The Spy Who Shagged Me (So sue me; after walking out of the theater, I told my date that it was the stupidest movie that I’d ever seen. He countered with this: “Yes, but you laughed your a** off the whole time!" True. It deserves special mention for introducing the concept of a ‘mini-me’ into the English vernacular.)
15. Star Trek (the usual; the Original Television Series, Deep Space Nine, II, IV, VI and First Contact); I even liked Insurrection, if only for this Commander Riker (Jonathan Frakes) line:

We're *through* running from these mutha-f*ckas b*stards.

What I just watched: Syriana (I got the message--that unseen forces are pulling the strings of world events. I just wish that the message had been more entertaining. And I don't like George Clooney with a little extra meat on him. Perhaps that's because I don't like him slim either.)

UPDATE: Next on the viewing list--Lawrence of Arabia.

Over There--Week Two

Anyone else watch the second installment of Over There on the FX Channel? (Interesting that the movie Black Hawk Down was on right before it.) I’ve never seen so many unlikable people in one TV show nor heard such a large amount of obnoxiously clichéd dialogue: “My husband makes mules look cooperative.” Additionally, I’ve never heard so many different people ask God to damn somebody or something so many times in such a short interval of time.

As for the combat action, I’m no Iraq vet, but to me that checkpoint looked poorly lit, insufficiently equipped and poorly disciplined. (And that pontificating, whiny guy who opened up the car door in contradiction of his orders made me want to shoot him. Had he shut up for a minute, he might have found the guy in the trunk sooner.)

The series seems just like all the other poorly conceived “war serials.” Only the particulars for the war at hand have changed. The personnel and the personal interaction is the same: dishonest, lazy soldier, the good soldier, the much-noted screaming sergeant (I never had to scream; menace or sarcasm is another story), the “commentator” (the guy I wanted to shoot). Back on the home front, there was the injured guy’s dysfunctional family: his deadbeat dad and his shrewish wife who looked about ten years older that he did. Then, to complete the scenario, there were the cavalier and uncaring officers: the one who notified the wife that her husband was injured and the doctor.

The theme that shot through this episode of Over There was callousness. From the soldiers who left the dead Iraqis they had killed by the side of the road—the vulture was such a “nice” touch—to the casualty officer who “waited” three days to notify the wife of he husband’s injury (but, somehow, the dad found out first), the message was clear. These are terrible, blasphemous people doing unworthy things; the enlisted personnel are stupid, the officers are evil and the families are trash.

Message received, five-by.

UPDATE: Commenter Ckrisz points to a Salon article in which an individual thought to be trying to run a checkpoint is left by the side of the road after being shot and killed by US troops. The only difference: the real-life checkpoint is mobile while the depicted one is stationary.

It's a heart-breaking article.

Oscar Musings (UPDATED)

Is there a woman in Hollywood, besides Beyonce Knowles, that still has her original face? I didn't recognize Renee Zellweger or Drew Barrymore at all. They both used to be attractive.

*****

Magic Johnson Theater interviews: Chris is in deep trouble now. ROTFL!

*****

Rock's Tim Robbins intro: "...boring us with his politics..." Very nice, Chris.

More...

UPDATE: More, maybe. It's getting quite boring.

UPDATE: LOL! One of the nominees for "Best Short Film" was asleep when they announced his name and put the camera on him. I'm feeling it.

UPDATE: Rock: "Oprah is so rich, I saw John Kerry proposing to her an hour ago." Oprah's look was priceless.

UPDATE: Sean Combs, formerly known as P-Diddy, formerly know as Puff Daddy. formerly known as Sean Combs utters a totally fake sounding line about his alleged inner child.

Now, come on. Beyonce is an excellent singer and a beautiful lady, but would no one else sing the Oscar-nominated songs?

Oh, great. Princess. I can never look at him without thinking of the guy who does an (excellent) impression of him in SNL.

Hey, that was the best "speech" yet (not Prince's)!

UPDATE: Hillary Swank gets the Best Actress Oscar! She should also get an award for being one of the few actresses who looks like a real person.

UPDATE: Jamie Foxx. No surprise, but it's still nice....come on, guy get it over with...Great Sidney Poitier impersonation!...Okay, it wasn't that bad. :-)

UPDATE: Million Dollar Baby gets Best Director (Clint Eastwood) and Best Picture. Hey, who doesn't like Clint? I giggled last week when he seemed to intimidate one Bill O'Reilly on the Factor. It was also nice to see that, when Clint mentioned his mother in his Best Director acceptance speech, she was still kickin' and sitting in the audience (and looking pretty good for ninety-six).

Eastwood's Baby has caught a lot of flack for certain aspects of its plot. Unfortunately, I know the ending, though I haven't seen it. But I'm still inclined to check it out. I may file a review here.

UPDATE: Tim Robbins responds to Chris Rock's little dig.

How original! Looks like those who were worried about Chris Rock's self-control had their concerns misplaced.

UPDATE:

La Shawn wasn't impressed.

The Anchoress liked the dresses.

And Ann Althouse cracks me up.

(Thanks to Michelle Malkin)

Eye Opener

Dr. Condoleezza Rice will have her public say regarding 9/11 tomorrow at 6AM PST. Don’t miss it.

"You are a Stiff Negotiator"

I was trying to decide whether the Enzyte male enhancment commercials are too much for TV or not, but I had to stop laughing first.